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I dream a lot. I know that not everyone can dream, or at least they don't remember their dreams, but I dream a lot. When I wake up, I'll remember what happened, but if I don't actively try to keep remembering eventually the dream will fade away, almost as if it doesn't belong in this world. It lives somewhere else and it's only here visiting inside of my mind.
Some dreams are good and some dreams are bad. Sometimes even my good dreams are bad. I'll wake up feeling guilty, like if I have a dream about sex, or I'll wake up feeling sad, like if I dream about my mother as if she's still alive and with me. I miss her a lot when that happens, and I also end up feeling bad because I have Declan's mom in my life now and I do like her. She's been wonderful to me and I'm grateful my daddy found someone to be with after going through the heartache of my mom going to Heaven.
I don't always know which is worse: the good dreams or the bad ones. “Good” is sort of an open concept and it's going to be different for everyone. For example, a sex dream about my husband when I'm married is perfectly find. A sex dream about Declan, my stepbrother, who I am definitely not married to, um…
Not so good?
I had one last night, and I think I'm having one again tonight. I remember it so vividly. I lay in bed, eyes closed, mostly dreaming, and I can remember the feel of Declan carrying me to his room. I remember us kissing before that. Every touch felt like fire on my skin, my lips, inside me…
He lifted off my shirt and stripped me down to nothing, laying me on his bed. And then he was naked, too. He lay with me, like a husband does with his wife, except we aren't that. It felt so good and right. When he was inside me, I finally understood what all of the feelings I've felt before were leading up to. It was like my mind opened to a new world entirely and something switched on inside me. I delighted in it, worshiped the feeling, and I held onto it until it burst from inside me like brilliant radiance.
Declan did the same. He worshiped me, adored me, and then he… he came inside me…
I'm dreaming, so of course none of this happened. Even still, I can feel the ache he left between my legs. Everything is sore. Muscles I never knew existed feel aching and sore. I want to remember this dream when I wake up. I feel like I need to. It's not going to happen for a long time, but I want to know the feeling. Things that happen in dreams aren't wrong, right? That's what Father Patch says, even if they make me feel guilty afterwards.
I open my eyes, just a little bit, and look at what the day has to offer me. It's bright out, the first light of the sun shining through the window. I'm in Declan's bed right now, which is a little odd, but I'm sleepy and I don't pay that fact too much mind. Maybe I'm still dreaming, too. This feels like a dream, and I can still feel the solid, pleasant ache between my thighs. It's nice.
I see Declan. He's with me, eyes closed, sleeping softly. For some reason this doesn't worry me. It's a dream, so why should it? He has his arm around me, holding me tight. We're sleeping face to face and I like the way he feels right now. I shift forward a little, pressing my forehead against his, and then I close my eyes again.
He feels real. All of this feels real. I'm still sleepy, though. Maybe I can have another dream before I wake up. Maybe this is a dream right now. There's worse things to dream about than cuddling with Declan, that's for sure.
I hear a bird chirp outside my window, the first of many. Another one follows, and they start singing a morning song together, ready to wake up all the other little animals outside. I imagine a squirrel yawning and poking his head out from a hideaway inside a tree, and a tiny caterpillar crawling along, looking for the perfect place to stop and become a butterfly.
I hope the birds are still singing when I wake up. I…
The doorbell rings, loud. Again and again. Whoever's at the front door, they keep pushing the button. I scramble and sit up, startled into a fully alert and awake state. I blink fast, trying to gauge my surroundings.
And that's when I realize I'm naked. I'm definitely in Declan's bed, too. He's laying right next to me, rubbing sleep from his eyes. In my shocked state of mind from hearing the doorbell, I accidentally threw the blankets off the bed, and…
There's a cock. Oh my gosh, that's Declan's cock. It's big. Is it always that big? I mean, it's… it's awake? I know how these things work and I'm not stupid, but it's not like I've had a lot of experience with men's genitalia.
I do the only thing I can think of at the moment. I scream.
We each have five main senses. These are what we use to perceive most of the world. Some animals have different senses. Bats and dolphins have echolocation, for example. Electric eels are really interesting because they have electrolocation, where they can sense something based off of the natural electricity it produces. Humans don't have these, but we also have smaller, invariably important senses like a sense of time. Maybe animals understand time, too. I don't know.
Why am I thinking about senses? There's a very good reason. It's something everyone's probably wondered about at one time or another.
What happens when we die? Well, I'm going to go with the obvious and say that there's Heaven and there's Hell. I think we go to one or the other. Heaven is probably wonderful, but do we have the same senses there? Maybe we have more. Maybe in heaven we can have echolocation like dolphins, and we can swim in an endless sea and explore an ocean of wondrousness in the afterlife.
I'm not sure. I've never been there. The Bible offers an image, but I think it's one of those things you have to see to understand.
And… what about Hell?
What's it look like? Fire and brimstone, maybe. Smell? Again, fire, burnt charcoal, sulfur, brimstone. Touch? Hot and sweltering, constantly on the verge of being too much, uncomfortable and searing. Taste? I… I don't even want to try on this one.
But what does Hell sound like?
It's open for debate, but I'm pretty sure I know exactly what it is. I think I heard it just now. As I slept, peaceful and serene, barely remembering what happened the night before, the seemingly innocuous sound of a doorbell starts ringing. Not just once, but over and over again. The doorbell rings and I sit there, rubbing sleep from my eyes, trying to wake up. Everything's coming back to me. Last night, what I did, what happened, how it felt, and…
Maddy sits up straight, naked, her breasts bouncing in her panic. She looks at me, looks around at my room, and then her mouth opens in a blood-curdling scream.
Seriously, I'm almost positive this is what Hell sounds like. It's not the scream, it's the doorbell.
It stops for a second, and then Maddy stops. Seconds pass. I try to sit up, to do some sort of rationalization, because, uh… you know, I had sex with her last night. How the fuck did that happen? Can anyone help me out with this one?
The blankets are gone, too. Maddy's staring between my legs, which draws my eyes to what she's looking at. I have the wonderful good fortune of having morning wood right now. Just a full on erection, cock throbbing in full site, while my deflowered stepsister stares at me in the bed we sinned in together last night.
Yeah, I'm completely fucked.
The doorbell rings again. Holy fucking shit, who is that?
Sorry, God. I… I'm sorry for a lot of things right now, but first and foremost I'm going to apologize for getting angry at whoever is ringing the doorbell. I'll apologize for the rest later if I can. “If I can” being the key phrase there. I don't know how you feel about me inadvertently corrupting Maddy last night. Something really screwed up was going on there. It's…
The doorbell rings again.
“Declan,” Maddy says, her voice flat, straight to the point.
“Please,” I say to her. “Let's just… not.”
“I can't believe this,” she says.
“It's not my fault,” I tell her.
She looks at me, nods. She's fully willing to believe this isn't my fault. At least that's a point in my favor.
Except then she says, “Whose fault is it?”
Yeah, I don't even know where to begin with this one, so…
“Let me put some pants on so I can answer the door,” I say.
I think this is a fully reasonable thing to say, and I'm happy to see Maddy feels the same way. She nods, saying nothing. I get out of bed, search around for my pants. I find every other article of clothing that belongs to either of us before I find my pants, which somehow ended up all the way under my bed. No clue how that happened. I'd say it's because God works in mysterious ways, but I don't even want to joke about any of this right now. I'm pretty sure that's how you get smote by lightning. It looks like it's a nice day out, but they don't call them random acts of God for nothing.
Also, Maddy's still watching me. She looks at me, waiting for the answers. Maddy, I don't have the answers. Then she looks at me putting my pants on. She stares at my cock, hard and bouncing and doing its best not to get stuffed into my pants where it can't do anything. When I look up at her and she realizes what she's doing, she starts to blush profusely. She looks away, then back again, shy and cute.
I've already sinned and I'm really tempted to sin again. This is what happens. It's a downward spiral.
Thankfully the hellish sound of the doorbell ringing, once again, pulls me away from another fall into temptation.
“This fucking guy,” I say, cursing.
“Declan!” Maddy says, stunned at my colorful language.
“Maddy, I'm sorry! It's just–”
“It could be a girl, you know?” she offers.
“I literally don't know what to say to that,” I say.
Maddy shrugs. Have I mentioned she's got amazing breasts? I always thought they'd be amazing, but now that I've seen them and I'm seeing them right now, uh… yeah, completely amazing. Maddy is an angel in all manners, body, soul, spirit, and whatever else you can imagine. She even has angelic breasts. They're perfectly pert, with nipples that are the exact right size that you just want to roll your tongue around them for days. Her areolae, which maybe aren't the most often observed body part, well… no, those are perfect, too. Just the right size for my mouth, like they're perfect little markers to show you where to press your lips before sucking her nipples into your mouth and teasing them with your tongue.
And the doorbell rings again.
Maddy realizes more of what's going on now and starts scrambling to cover herself with… something. I don't know what, because she threw all my blankets on the floor earlier. She goes for a pillow, but then changes her mind and dives off the bed, grabbing my sheet. She pulls it up and wraps it around her body, which isn't really doing her any good because it's a white sheet and the window from the morning sun shines right through it, offering me a translucent peek of everything Maddy's trying to hide from view.
This is even worse than seeing her entirely naked. I don't know how, I don't know why, but it's worse. She's too much for me. I don't deserve this. I am fully convinced I'm going to Hell right now.
Which makes this the perfect time to go answer the doorbell. Baby steps. I can redeem myself. I can…
I stampede down the stairs shirtless, and run to the front door. I swing it open without bothering to recognize all of the terrible things that might end up happening. What if this is my mom and Maddy's dad returning? What if they locked themselves out of the house so they keep ringing the doorbell to get us to answer, and now they're going to discover me without a shirt on and Maddy naked in my bed?
I'm going to Hell, but I don't want to go immediately, you know? If Maddy's dad sees all of this, I won't be on this earth for much longer, trust me.
Thankfully it's no one of consequence. I didn't realize I was holding my breath at first, so it's a little jarring to let it all out and start breathing again.
The courier lady at the door just kind of gives me a concerned look before shrugging and handing me a piece of paper on a clipboard to sign.
“What's this?” I ask, stupidly staring at the words on the paper.
“You Declan Calhoun?” she asks. “Or he lives here?”
“Uh, yeah, that's me,” I tell her.
“I've got your luggage. Was on a plane this morning and I drove it over from the airport. Just need you to sign for it, so…”
She stares at the clipboard in my hand, waiting, my luggage at her side. I probably should have noticed that before, but I've had a lot going on this morning. I didn't wake up to the best of circumstances here.
I pull a pen out of the metal clip on the clipboard and sign above the signature line on the paper, then pass both back to her. She takes it, gives me a curt nod like she's glad this is finally over with, then rolls my suitcase over to me. I pick it up, carry it into my house, and start to say thanks or bye or both, but she's already in her car and driving away.
I stand in the doorway, the handle of my luggage gripped tight in my hand, and stare at everything the morning has to offer. Everything's so nice out right now. Maybe I should leave. Just like this. I have luggage, I can put my shoes on, and… just go. Become a hermit somewhere, atone for my sins in a cave in the middle of the woods surrounded by squirrels and rabbits and birds.
Sounds good, but then Maddy yells down the stairs at me. She's actually standing at the top of the stairs, still covered in my bed sheet. She wrapped it around her, for all the good that's doing. My phone dangles in her hand, precarious, like she's afraid to touch it.
It's ringing and I recognize the ringtone immediately.
Well, now that's awkward. Um…
It was definitely not a dream, Maddy! Sorry to be the one to tell you that. Also, I wonder what Declan's mom's going to tell him? Are they coming home right now? Uh oh. At least he got his luggage back after the mishap with the flight the other day, right? That's always good news.
The next chapter is going to be a lot of fun, so keep an eye out for that! I'm super excited to finish it up and share it with you. I really hope you're enjoying Maddy and Declan's story so far. We're making a lot of strides with it and it's getting intense!
Bye for now! ^_^
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