This chapter has some steamy parts to it…
(Updates are now planned for every Friday afternoon/evening instead of Sunday)
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One Night Sin – Maddy & Declan's Story (Chapter 8)
Declan is gone when I wake up. Or he was never there to begin with. I'm not sure why he'd come sleep on the sun porch with me in the first place, but it seemed so real last night that I almost believed it.
Well, a lot of my dreams were incredibly vivid last night. The one I woke up to was especially real to me. I don't know if I feel comfortable admitting that, though. I know it was just a dream, that it definitely didn't happen, but do you know how, um…
Do you know how sometimes when you have a dream and you wake up from it, but it feels like it really happened? Maybe it's a dream about falling in love with someone, and after you're awake you have those same affectionate feelings, like maybe your dream lover is real and they're in the kitchen making you a cup of coffee. You thought they were a dream, but they might show up, just come right around the corner, and join you in bed while you cuddle and slowly wake up for the day.
Or else you can remember the things you did in your dream, and you know it was a dream, but it seems like you actually did those things even if you've never actually done anything like that. The dream couldn't have been that long, but you feel like you went through the whole cycle of falling in love, and then being in love, and then…
Then you're awake and none of it's happened, but that doesn't change the fact that you still feel like it did.
My dream was kind of like that, but different. I don't know if I feel comfortable talking about it, but it's just a dream, right? Um… yup…
In my dream I'm with Declan. I know he's my stepbrother now, but I don't know if he is in the dream. Maybe that never happened, or maybe it's different. A lot happened before that, but it's kind of hazy now. The part I remember the most is what I woke up to.
He comes to me in the middle of the night, slowing opening my bedroom door and slipping into my room. I pretend to be asleep at first, because I know he shouldn't be here. I keep my eyes closed and I breathe softly, but Declan still comes. He stands at the side of my bed and looks down at me. Gentle, he reaches for the blankets covering me, then carefully pulls them back, revealing my sleeping form.
I never do this, but in my dream I'm naked. I almost revel in the idea that he's seeing me this way, too. I'm sleeping, right? Or I'm pretending to. I shift a little and move onto my back so he can see all of me. His hand grabs my thigh and with slow deliberation he spreads my legs.
After that, um…
A lot happens after that. The thing is I've never experienced this in real life, but in my dream it seemed so real. I can remember the way his fingers slipped inside me after spreading my lower lips. I remember how he cupped one of my breasts in his hand, squeezing lightly, and then lowered his mouth onto my other breast, teasing his tongue in a circle around the outside before making his way to the center. He taps at my nipple with the tip of his tongue before sucking the entire thing into his mouth, his lips latching onto my areola.
I remember the heated gasps I made just before he unbuckled his pants and joined me on the bed. I wasn't pretending to be sleeping anymore and I opened my eyes to look at him. Naked, the both of us naked, he climbs onto my bed and between my legs. His rock hard cock glistens in the faint moonlight surrounding his, a shimmer of precum coating the head. He slides up my body, coming to kiss me, and as soon as his lips meet mine, he's inside of me. His cock glides inside me, a perfect fit, and as soon as I feel him in me I clamp down, instinctive.
Our bodies meld, becoming one. I've never felt anything like this before, not in reality and not in a dream. He thrusts into me over and over again until I'm very close, I'm about to, I'm…
I don't know if I'm sad or grateful that I chose this exact moment to wake up. I can still feel him throbbing inside me even though I know there's nothing there and there never was. I can feel the weight of him on top of me as he thrusts into me and grinds against me. I can feel his body hard against my pulsing clit, and that feeling is definitely still there. It takes a moment to realize that it's my fingers now, and not Declan. Confused, I pull my hand away and try to snap back to reality. I can't, um… I'm not supposed to… I…
The things that happen in a dream are fine, but it doesn't stop me from feeling guilty about it. I know it's beyond my control, but this is Declan, and this is… it's sex.
I'm a virgin, and I'm supposed to stay a virgin until I'm married, except I don't even know if I want to get married. That's no excuse, it's just…
What about just once? If I just have sex once, and then never again? If I taste of the forbidden fruit, as it were, and then I devote the rest of my life to God and everything he has to offer. Declan and I can do that together, too. I think that would be nice.
It's kind of silly, but sometimes I worry about him being lonely. He makes friends easily, but I don't know if he has any close friends, you know? There's a difference. I like Declan and I think I want him to be my friend. I mean, we are friends, so… but that's not exactly what I mean. To be honest, I don't really know what I mean. Part of it is because I just woke up and I'm a little confused, but the other part is that even when I'm wide awake it's still confusing to me.
I stretch a little and try to ignore the wetness and the throbbing between my legs. I'm reluctant to admit this isn't the first time this has happened. This dream was an especially vivid one, but… yes… I've had dreams before. Different dreams, with slightly different circumstances. Usually after very strong ones I end up going to confession that same day, but Father Patch almost always tells me the same thing. We can't be held responsible for what happens in our dreams. It's not real, and it's not something we intentionally thought of.
I've intentionally thought of these things before, though. I try not to, but it's hard. I guess that's the whole point. If it were easy, then it wouldn't be as powerful and important. It wouldn't be a very good test of temptation if almost everyone could avoid it without issue.
And… I need to wake up now. I need to open my eyes, ignore the pleasant tingling feeling simmering through my body, and go back inside. I need to do this instead of closing my eyes and trying to fall back to sleep to see if I can continue my dream and reach a blissful climax.
Trying not to fall into temptation really sucks sometimes. Ugh.
Also, despite everything, completely ignoring all of what happened in my dreams, I want to see Declan. Maybe we can have breakfast together. Wouldn't that be nice? I know I saw him in my dream, and so I guess this could get kind of awkward, but he doesn't know about my dream and that's not even why I want to see him. I don't think it is. I just miss him, you know?
I roll out of bed, or it's really a wicker sofa on the sun porch. The cushions are comfy, though. It's warm out, too. The sun shines through the glass walls and everywhere I go feels toasty and relaxing. I like it. I could definitely spend the entire morning out here eating breakfast and reading a book.
Reaching into my pajama pants pocket, I grab the key for the backdoor and go to let myself inside. I close the door behind me and look around, but no one's here. The sun porch is just off of the dining room, with the kitchen and the breakfast table right off of that.
I smell coffee, so I think someone must be here, but when I traipse into the kitchen, it's empty. A half-full pot of coffee sits there waiting for me, though. It's still hot and looks fresh. A handwritten note sits next to the coffee pot.
It's from my daddy and my stepmom, and it says:
We had to go out unexpected this morning. I'm not sure when we'll be back, but hopefully it won't take long. There's a problem with some of the patients in the nursing home and your stepmother wanted to make sure we helped out. I know it's the start of summer vacation, and this is just her volunteer job, but it's important and we should give back where we can. I think you'd agree.
Neither of us saw Declan this morning, but I'm sure he's around. You two be careful, alright? I left you some money in case you want to get more food at the store, or you're welcome to order a pizza, too. I left a credit card you can use if you're feeling generous and want to go grocery shopping for all of us for the week. Just check the fridge and see what we need. You can call either of us, too. We might not be able to answer right away, but we'll call you back as soon as we can.
I'm sorry to have to leave like this suddenly. I promise we won't be gone long, though. I know you were looking forward to having us all together for the summer again. We'll still do that, just later, alright? Me and your stepmother will take you and Declan out to dinner when we get back, I promise.
Have a wonderful day, sweetheart,
Under the note is the money he left for me and Declan and then one of his credit cards. I shift them to the side along with the note. Going grocery shopping could be fun, and I'll definitely look into making a list, but first I need some coffee. Breakfast, too! Just something quick and easy.
I want to make sure I can get to church early before Father Patch is too busy. He's usually around for early morning talks and confessions, since some people like to go on the weekdays before work. I'm sure he'd make an exception if I showed up later, but he's usually busy in his office from late morning to early afternoon and I don't want to bother him if I can help it.
So… what do I make for breakfast? I really want some French toast. It's not so hard if I'm just making enough for me, right? I'm the only one here, so…
I wonder where Declan is?
Before I start to make my breakfast, I tiptoe through the house and up the stairs. Slow, just in case he's sleeping, I go to his bedroom door. It's closed, which probably means I should knock. I listen at the door first, but I don't hear anything. Quietly, I wrap my fingers around his doorknob and turn it. It opens, and I push it slowly, peeking inside.
His bed's immaculate, and he's not sleeping in it. It kind of looks like he didn't sleep in it at all last night, but I'm sure that's not the case. Either way, he's not here, and I don't hear him anywhere at all upstairs. Not in the bathroom, not in the den, not in my dad's office, not in the book room.
Which means he's not here. Hmm.
That's alright. I'm sure I'll see him later. I jump down the stairs, probably acting like I'm ten years old again. No one can see me, so it doesn't matter. Ha! I skip to the kitchen, grab some eggs from the fridge, a bowl from the cupboard, and some bread, then I go about making my French toast.
I make an extra piece for Declan, just in case.
One Night Sin – Maddy & Declan's Story (Chapter 9)
I get back home just as my mom and stepdad are leaving. They look harried, so I guess something's up. They take a quick look at me, almost like they're confused I'm here at first, and then my mom comes running down the front walkway to give me a hug.
“Declan! You're here. How was your flight? Did everything go well?” she asks.
“Yeah, uh… about that,” I say before telling her everything.
I mean, let's be honest for a second… I don't tell her everything. I don't tell her that I was ogling my stepsister in her sleep this morning. Or last night. Or whenever. I know what happens when you say something like that, alright? I learned my lesson years ago when I first went to confession, and I'm not really up for a repeat of old history.
I just tell her about the flight, how my luggage got lost. I decide to kind of lie about where I stayed last night. I didn't have my key so I stayed with a friend. Yeah, let's go with that. It's a lie of omission, and I really shouldn't have said it, but I'd just rather not get a glare from my stepdad if I tell him that I slept out back on the sun porch with Maddy last night. Maddy's kind of my friend, so it's not like I'm completely lying, either. Maybe? Fuck if I know.
My stepdad comes over and gives me a hug, too. He looks grim about the loss of my luggage, but it's cool. Don't worry about it, guys. It's coming. I'll get it back, I swear.
“Sorry to make this reunion short,” he says. “We need to head to the nursing home. There's a norovirus outbreak and a lot of the staff are getting sick, too. Everything should be fine, but it's a hassle to deal with so they're asking for volunteers to help out.”
“Got it,” I say. “I'll pray for you.”
My mom beams, and my stepdad gives me this kind of satisfied nod. I don't think I did anything special, but I know that's the kind of thing people like to hear sometimes. I'm going to be honest and say that I don't know if God cares about a norovirus outbreak in a nursing home. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying he doesn't care. I just mean that I'm kind of skeptical that he'd do anything besides letting it run its course. It should work its way through the place in a matter of days or maybe a week at the most, so that's all there really is to it.
Praying is cool, though. I think the important part of prayer is that people know you're in their thoughts. That's the part that makes sense to me. God might not actually do anything about it, but people know you're thinking about them and that makes them feel better. Sometimes that's the only thing you can really do for someone, you know?
“Oh! Here's my key,” my mom says, reaching into her purse and pulling out this monstrosity of a keyring. She finagles the whole thing, finally working the house key off its ring, and she hands it to me.
“There's money for you and Maddy on the kitchen counter,” my stepdad adds. “Order out for dinner if you want. I left a credit card so you can go grocery shopping if you need to, too.”
“Alright, cool,” I say, accepting my responsibilities.
Don't lose the key. Order dinner with Maddy. Maybe go grocery shopping. Got it. I can do this.
They leave eventually. My mom keeps hugging me and kissing me on the cheek until my stepdad finally manages to pull her away and lead her to the car. She waves frantically after me as they drive away, though. Yeah, that's my mom. I love her, but she gets a little too excited sometimes. I don't even want to tell you about the first time she showed up at my school for that parent career day thing they do.
Now that I can actually get inside, it's not as exciting. That's how it always is, don't you think? If you can't do something, it seems infinitely better. Like how I was stuck outside last night, and… nah, that's not a good example. I'd sleep outside every night if I got to sleep next to Maddy. I get that we weren't exactly sleeping with each other or right next to each other, but whatever. Don't judge me.
I'm just glad to finally be able to get into my own house. It's just not as exciting once I'm inside, that's all. No big deal.
I head up to my room first to change my clothes. I should take a shower while I'm at it, too. I fully plan on doing those two things, but something stops me first. Just sitting there on my bed, all immaculate and pristine, is a letter. It's got my name on it in familiar script.
I open up the letter and unfold the note inside. It's from Father Patch. I'm going to “too long; didn't read” this note for you and tell you that he wants me to come to the church this morning because he has something important to discuss with me. Maybe I can help him out this summer with some things and get experience for the future.
And, you know what? That's a great idea, especially since I wanted to go to confession today. Plus, if I'm working in the church I'll be a lot less tempted to hang out with Maddy, which will just be a lot less temptation in my life altogether. Sometimes you have to distract yourself, you know? This is that.
So yeah, that's what I do. Before I go, I make a fresh pot of coffee and pour myself a cup. Maddy's still sleeping, but I'm sure she'll appreciate hot coffee. Then I take a shower, I get dressed, and I head to the church. It's not that far away. Pretty nice walk, actually.
That's the only nice thing about this, though. Everything that happens afterwards is basically extremely fucking terrible. It's the beginning of the end.
God, please forgive me…
I've been having some trouble keeping with the Sunday schedule I initially had planned out. It's nothing too bad, I've just ended up being busy on the weekends more often than not. So instead of Sundays, I'm switching the updates for this one to Friday! I think it'll work out better that way and it'll give everyone something to look forward to at the end of their weeks.
Originally I just kind of picked Sunday because it seemed fitting for the story, haha. Since it deals with that whole forbidden religious aspect, and the whole church on Sundays thing, I thought it'd be fun to kind of tie it into that. It just didn't work out so well for me.
Don't worry, though! I”m still keeping up with this story. I included two chapters this week since I missed one last week. These are some fun ones, too. We see a little of Maddy's forbidden sexuality, and then the beginning of Declan's return is coming to a head very shortly. The next few weeks are going to be intense, so definitely keep an eye out!
I'm also working on some other things. I know that many of you are excited about Caleb and Scarlet, and they'll be coming soon, but I had an idea that I really couldn't miss out on writing, so…
You're going to see Grey and Fiona coming to Amazon very shortly. Oh ho ho! They're um… a lot different, though. I don't want to give too much away there, but I'll have a sample chapter for you to check out shortly. Make sure you follow me on Facebook for that if you haven't already! https://www.facebook.com/MiaClarkWrites/
I hope you're enjoying Maddy and Declan's story so far. Is there anything you want to see from them in the future? Let me know what you think!
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